One last conversation

A document falls to the ground, and at first the prospect says, “Don’t read that.”

Soon, though, she explains that this letter identifies the music she wants played and what she wants to wear at her funeral.

This experience convinced Risha Baddaloo, BSc, LUTCF, about an idea she’d heard the previous year from her father, former MDRT member Trevor A. Baddaloo, who’d learned it at the 1986 MDRT Annual Meeting: Encourage clients to write down not just their feelings for the people closest to them to be shared after they die, but a detailed message communicating all planning that has been put in place.

“I was told in a training session that part of being an advisor is to help clients get their last wishes granted, as one reason to take out insurance is to make sure loved ones will be OK,” said Risha Baddaloo, a 13-year MDRT member from San Fernando, Trinidad and Tobago. “When I saw this letter, I realized I can talk to clients about doing something similar.”

The year was 2010, and Baddaloo only had been in the financial services profession for a few months. Yet since meeting with that prospect — who had documented musical wishes for her funeral to ensure that her husband didn’t choose sad music for her — she has refined her approach to love letters, which she also refers to as a “phone call from heaven.”

What

The principle comes from helping people think about what they would want to say after they died if they could have one more conversation with someone. That can include anything they want to tell a loved one, both emotional things they want to be sure are known and directions about financial elements that potentially could be misunderstood.

In some ways the letter is like a more personalized version of a will. Baddaloo recommends updating it annually to connect current coverages and messages to the appropriate people involved, whether parents, kids (especially as a family expands), siblings, friends or otherwise. That could concern money to pay for a mortgage, take care of grandchildren, go on vacation and more.

Who

Despite shifting her perspective thanks to a prospect, Baddaloo — who has two assistants and handles insurance, retirement, and investments for 600 to 700 young professionals and small-business owners — now only discusses the concept with existing clients. She doesn’t want prospects to think she is trying to manipulate them by selling through emotion. Also, by waiting to discuss love letters until she knows more about a client’s goals and personality — and the client is more comfortable with their advisor — Baddaloo can then communicate the value of the letter in a way that feels specific to the individual.

When

Baddaloo often brings up the idea of writing a letter during policy deliveries, transitioning from the acquisition of coverage to the people who would benefit. As this might remind clients of something they’ve seen in a romantic movie, Baddaloo sometimes makes that connection herself. She references films like 2016’s “Me Before You” — in which a letter received after someone dies communicates financial security to the beneficiary — or 2007’s “P.S. I Love You,” which was driven by letters received after someone dies and was another take on a similar story told in the 1997 South Korean film “The Letter” and its 2004 Thai remake of the same name.

How

While this information could be shared in an audio or video message, to date Baddaloo only has encouraged clients to use a written letter. She advises them to start with something like, “If you’re reading this letter, that means I’m no longer here with you. I know you’ll miss me; please remember all the good times we had, and I want to let you know you made me proud. And don’t worry, as I have put all these things in place.” By talking about the letter, Baddaloo helps clients think about death while attaching feelings to relationships and specifics to their planning.

This also can lead to conversations about additional coverage if the letter identifies areas of need. Clients often ask Baddaloo to read a draft, and she might help them by adding specifics such as changing something generic about paying debts to more detailed language about what those debts are. Clients sometimes leave the letter with Baddaloo and other times leave it with a lawyer or the executor of their will.

Plus

Even if a client doesn’t feel right about crafting one of these letters due to their family or financial situation, Baddaloo reiterates the importance of being prepared for the unknown, and that letters might be directed to parents or friends even if there aren’t kids involved. The approach has driven numerous referrals, as Baddaloo offers a service that others don’t. “A lot of families are lost when something unexpected occurs and they don’t know the wishes of their loved ones,” she said. “This doesn’t put money in my pocket, but it’s a personal touch and connection for clients, and that’s what really makes the difference.”

Questions to consider for a love letter

• What would you like your loved one to know regarding how you felt about them?
• What should they know about your medical coverage, funeral details or otherwise?
• What coverages are in place, and what background/account/asset/contact information do they need to know?
• What needs to be paid for, and how have you allocated funds for this?
• Is there anything else you need to share so they can feel informed, comforted and protected?